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The Ballad of Mountain Boy and Valley Lad

from A Girl, a Dog, and a Magician by Trashbag Ponchos

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The mythos that began all mythos. The alleged mono-myth. The truth that all creation stories are based off of. We found it etched in stone at the grave of Abraham Lincoln.

lyrics

Chords: yeah we aren't gonna bother with this

Up in the mountains way up high,
There lived a boy who made a famous pie.
His name was Mountain Boy.
He feared no man, he feared no beast,
And potted plants he feared the least. Mountain Boy.

Down in the valley far below,
Where no one else dared to go, lived Valley Lad.
Valley lad was sly and quick,
He grew great fruit that was his trick (Valley Lad and special fruit).

Mountain boy knew the fruit was the best in all the land,
With such a prize he knew his pies could be twice as grand.
In the night he stole a bite from the Valley Lad.
He made a pie so very good, it made the heavens mad.

So god and all of his angels came down from the sky.
They came to judge the living, the dead, and the maker of this pie.
“This pie you made from stolen fruit, too great for mortal man.”
So God reached out and took the pie, with His immortal hand.

So Mountain boy said to the god,
“Please do not take this pie,
For if you eat a single slice, man will surely die.”
(Mountain Boy and the a-pie-calypse).

“I baked the hope and all the joy into a flaky crust,
and from the fruit grew the world, and it was very just.”
(Mountain Boy and the flaky crust).

God cared not for his pleas and he stole the fateful pie,
And with whipped cream and strawberries he condemned man to die.

“Mountain boy what have you done? You’ve surely doomed us all.
The pie was meant for balance son and now it goes to God.
I will not abandon you in your time of need,
For as the stories have foretold, it’s time to plant the seed.”

So Mountain Boy and Valley Lad they hashed a cunning plan,
To take back the cosmic pie and turn God into man.
From the seed grew a tree a thousand miles high,
Stretching through the mortal world and into heaven’s sky.

Another pie baked Mountain Boy and in his flaky crust,
He channeled man’s malice, his greed and his lust.
With the pie secured they scrambled over root, branch and bark.
To reach heaven’s table before dessert could start.

Through the mist they moved and across the clouds they crept.
Sneaking every quietly to the place where food was kept.
(Mountain Boy and the refrigerador).

With great skill and alacrity they switched the flaky pastries,
And to the tree they fled with their final prize.
As night turned to day, they finally got away,
And across the roof they fled Heaven’s prying eyes.

Without a thought he ate the pie, and it resigned him to his fate.
A thousand miles down he fell at a fairly lethal rate.
God’s time was done, the jig was up, he knew it in his human heart.
So he closed his eyes and held his breath to let the gravity tear him apart

credits

from A Girl, a Dog, and a Magician, released October 22, 2016
Music by Andreas Miles
Lyrics by Cole Juckette, Luke Glassman, and Andreas Miles
Recorded by Tyler Dreher and Cole Juckette
Mixed and Mastered by Tyler Dreher

Cole Juckette - Vocals
Andreas Miles - Guitar/Gang Vocals
Luke Glassman - Bass/Gang Vocals
Eric Larson - Harmonica/Trumpet/Gang Vocals

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Trashbag Ponchos Lincoln, Nebraska

We play folk-punk jams in Nebraska.

Cole Juckette - Vocals/Mandolin/Percussion

Andreas Miles - Guitar/Vocals

Luke Glassman - Bass/Vocals

Eric Larson - Vocals/Uke/Harmonica/Trumpet
... more

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